Tis the season to be engaged, graduated, and newly-married! As I genuinely congratulate and am happy for my friends and Facebook acquaintances, COME ON!!
I still have high-school acne, yet alone I can't even begin to be hopeful in finding my mate before my child-bearing days are over!
As I hide my hideous face in my unemployed hole, grateful that not a soul in my city has bothered to request my presence.
My daily activities include rabbit-chasing on Wikipedia with the original search as an 11th century French Chief of State.
I might venture to the museum to stare at the same painting for an hour at a time.
So, congratulations in one big greeting card!
I'll be on Pinterest re-pinning everything you all have already checked off your lists of things to do for this year: wear flannel, find a decent man, celebrate Thanksgiving, get engaged, graduate from college, get married, and celebrate Christmas.
Happy New Years, y'all. I'm ready.
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